(Note: This is an extract from an unedited, but slightly compressed version of a fiction, one of my ongoing projects.) “I hate being broke” This was the first thing I knew about you. And this is how it begun. You were a regular visitor/contributor to a web forum. I was redirected there by an advert/clickbait. Coincidence? Fate? Destiny? you decide.. I responded your post with a genuine empathy. And to be honest, I was not expecting a response. However, you surprised me. Soon We were chatting on web messenger.It was pre social network era. Our online chats weren’t regular, you could only access the Internet at work and I was away from computers during work hours. Emails were our “offline” messages and 123greetings were our "Facebook shares". Approximately three months after our first conversation, I suggested us to meet up for a coffee in the town and you accepted abruptly. Our date was set at what I thought to be a well-known cafe in the centre of the town. I still find it funny how, despite giving you a detailed instruction, you ended up waiting outside the wrong café. To your defence, The cafe did have the similar name, but it was almost half a mile away. . The first thing I noticed was your beautiful smile. You looked younger than your profile picture and were surprisingly shy. You had a short dark hair. And if I remember correctly, you were wearing a black Cardigan, blue jeans and a pair of pink trainers. It wasn’t love at first sight, and there wasn’t any spark either. Again, I wasn’t looking for anything. I just wanted to meet you. We went inside. You opted for a coffee. I got myself a beer. You were very shy.Perhaps a bit nervous too. I think it’s fair to say that we didn’t talk a lot. Regardless, I enjoyed your company and hoped you did too. We arranged a second meeting the following week, for a lunch. You agreed. As usual. I hailed a taxi for you, hugged you goodbye. You got in, opened the window and waved back with a smile. You were more relaxed and comfortable on our second meeting, and definitely chatty. Our meetings became a regular thing. We met mostly at restaurants and shopping malls and occasionally at the cinema. I must admit, I was quietly and gently falling for you. There was nothing suggesting that you were feeling anything towards me.. I chose to hold myself back. Fast forward several months and we were on our way to a trip to a town few hundred miles away. We were both over the moon. We stopped at a cafe for some breakfast and I got some water,cola crisps and a packet of chewing gum. I remember joking you about plastic sick bags, but you didn’t get it. You just stood there with a confused smile. Our vehicle was a 15 seater MPV, crammed with almost 20 people. You got the window and I squeezed next to you. We drove through the busy, overcrowded high street followed by dusty and bendy roads. But As we drove further from the valley, the road was less crowded and as we entered the highway we could see cows grazing in the field and people enjoying rafting in the river.. It may have been a bit hot for you as we sped towards the foothills, but the weather was just perfect for me, almost as perfect as your company. We were enjoying the scenery and all of the sudden,our car came to a halt due to an incident ahead. Our driver got out and ran ahead to investigate. We drank cola that was warmed up from the heat inside the car and waited for the driver to return. Traffic jams like these usually take hours to clear. We took pictures, even went for a short walk It took almost two hours for the traffic to be cleared, and to make up the time the passengers unanimously voted to skip the lunch stop. When we arrived, I remember giving you a big hug. If I had observed correctly, you looked very uncomfortable, if not, shocked. I wasn’t sure why. Perhaps you weren’t a hugger, you were tired, or perhaps it was sudden and unexpected for youu. We then started looking for a hotel, something we could have planned in advance, Several places turned us down, for unknown reasons. I didn’t think the town was that busy. After three or four attempts, we finally managed to acquire a shelter for the night. Our room was massive, you had a single bed/couch several yards away from my King sized bed. I wasn’t going to ask you to share my bed, no matter how much I wanted to. But The option was always there for you. I took a quick shower while you waited outside, then you had a wash before both of us went out. It was almost dawn and the street lights were already on. Several restaurants were playing loud music, buses were rushing to get their last passengers and nightclubs were setting up their front doors. We opted for a quiet pub, above the road where we could witness the city of lights. We ordered beer and roasted peanuts, I remember you laughing at the typos in the menu. We had some beer and snacks, involuntarily donated some blood to mosquitoes and opted for an early night. We arrived back to the hotel, I went to the bathroom to get changed while you observed the paintings on the wall. I got into my bed and waited for you to return from the bathroom. You, dressed into your nighties, looked beautiful as ever. You looked at me, shyly and headed towards your bed. “You can sleep here with me, you know, I don’t bite” i said. “No, Thank you” You declined quietly and politely. No pressure, but feel free to come over. I said before switching the light off. The next morning, we went for a walk, had breakfast at a restaurant with a massive garden overseeing the famous lake. It was a lovely, sunny day, so we decided to go for a boating trip. Well, I decided because you agreed to anything. I am sure you would have said yes to bungee jumping without the ropes if I had asked you to. So we hired a paddle boat, went to the middle of the lake. A day well spent. We had some Chinese for lunch and went to the pub. You didn’t want to stay late. We got some booze and stayed in, watching bollywood. I then asked you to come closer as you were sitting uncomfortably in the corner of the couch. You declined, saying that you don’t trust me. I was shocked. I was expecting you to fall for me but you won’t trust me to sit closer? I needed a drink, and reevaluate everything. I got up, put my shoes on and left. I asked you not to wait for me. I went to a quieter looking pub, ordered a beer and began to recall all of our times together. I recalled that we never talk about us, we talked a lot about our family,friends and relatives but almost nothing about ourselves, we knew a lot about our families but not enough about ourselves. After three beers and a bowl or two of popcorn, I decided to give a day before concluding that you just wanted to stay friends. Or even.. Bit tipsy, I decided to go clubbing, just to clear my head, and obviously to deal with my disappointment. When I got back to the hotel, you were asleep. We were supposed to leave the next day, but I begged you to stay for one extra night. You had to call in at your workplace, and you were worried they might fire you. We went for a short drive outside the town. I was observing your every moves, body language and conversation. I had to discover you. There was nothing to suggest that there was any space for me in your heart. Although I was heartbroken, I didn’t say a word and pretended that everything was normal. I bought two air tickets to fly home. You were very excited to fly for the first time. We went clubbing and went to bed early. I didn’t ask you to share my bed. I didn’t see you for a week due to few unforeseen circumstances. But when I did, you were still the same, we went to a Thai restaurant, and you gave me an animated DVD and a blank card which I still have. Our communication reduced dramatically after this. I am partially to blame it was impossibleto mend my broken heart while we’re around. Last time I heard about you from a friend that you are living in Australia or New Zealand and are happily married. I will never find out whether I broke your heart or you broke mine. Did I fancy you yes? , I did. Did you? I’ll never know. Comments are closed.
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